While I love a good conspiracy theory as much as the next .....

This particular book left me cold.

For those who wonder, yes I am in possession of the original LOOK magazines from that time.  My ex's Grandmother had saved them and wanted me to have them.  She knew I'd care for them and trust me I have.  I've also read things that you might not know - things that were reported THEN but lost over time - unless you really dug.

I've heard them all I think.  The most interesting theory wasn't that it was a conspiracy but rather an accident.  I think it was supported by Cyril Wrecht but I'm not certain.  Anyway the supposition goes that a Secret Service person standing in the back of one of the limos lost his balance and oopsed.  Could be.  It's plausible and the trajectories etc could be made to match.  I've also heard that Johnson (sitting in the next limo) pulled out a revolver and shot him.  Far fetched?  yep.

Why do we love a good conspiracy theory?  Is it our way of making sense of a nonsensical situation?  Is it our way of making the square pegs fit round holes so we're happy, organized, and off to deal with another situation?  Or is it our love of a good drama.

I have my own theories, supported by cursory research and access to interesting reading material.  My foremost theory is that we'll probably never know because when the truth is shaded, albeit a little or a lot, then the truth disappears.  As in when you make the evidence fit to the crime.  The real crime is technically unsolved.

I was also fortunate enough to have a father on the East Coast in a restricted program when the shit hit the fan on many things in 62 and 63.  He vowed we'd never truly know.  I think he's probably right on that account.

For now, I will definitely NOT recommend the book above.  It's mostly filled with *I* read this and *I* studied that and look how *I* can make this stuff make sense.  Cutting to the spoilers - the CIA did it because Kennedy was turning into a pacifist and had been having secret talks with the USSR.

Doubtful.  Plus not really well written either.

Oh Cris if only Tim were still around to help me trash this book.  I thought about him when I finally skipped to the last and thought OMG I have better ideas than that (and better research) hehehe  He had the info that I never did have (being born in 64) and this one?  just not good - even from a conspiracy theory point of view.

Voyeur anyone?

I think in some form or fashion we're all voyeurs at heart.

Having just recently hit Amazon dot com in search of reading material, I found myself ordering a book on JFK, the one above on Marilyn Monroe, and wondering if there was a good John Lennon biography out there.

These are not obscure works (like The Mullendore Murder Case which is out of print and dreadfully expensive) but rather popular books.

Why do we want to know so much - and so much more - about the famous and infamous people?  Is it voyeurism - a wish to see inside their private lives in hopes of a glimpse of something tawdry?  It is because they are or rather were famous and we want to see what made them tick?  Maybe figure out why they were famous?  explain the magic?

I don't know the whys and wherefores - I just know that I'm not the only one.

but I am probably the only one reading this who ever read The Mullendore Murder Case.  's ok - if you're not from rural Oklahoma, you probably didn't hear about it.  I bet you heard about Karen Silkwood though ........

Making Choices

I finally ordered our faireever passes for the Maryland Renaissance Festival.  It's a special place where we used to go every one of the 19 days - rain, shine, frigid cold - didn't matter we were there.

Not so much in the last couple of years.  I see the limitations and I know that it's a compromise that I have to make.  Explaining that to others ... not quite so easy.  Then again, I really don't owe anyone an explanation except Jon.

Our dearest friends understand.  They help watch him for signs of distress and pain while I wander a bit.  I wander Revel Grove less and less though as time passes.  It still retains its magic.  The wonder of the trees.  Being away from technology.  Hearing live music, sharing a cup with friends, hugs, smiles, greetings -- those are still the same. 

We have sadly changed though.

The benches at O'Shucks are the best because they offer back support.  However, because they're the best, it's often crowded.  Sometimes he needs to sit practically all day.  Others we can wander a bit but still need to leave early -- always way too soon for me, but usually far too late for him.

Compromises.

I *could* go by myself but then I'd miss him and he'd miss me.  I'd rather make the choice to spend time together, even if it is in front of the television watching The History Channel.

Choices.

I remember the choices I had to make with Mom (aka The Wild Granny).  At first she wandered and looped and got drunk with a friend (and got sick in the trashcan at the White Hart - that's still legendary) but later it was just part way down the path and only for a few hours.  Those few hours were restorative though.

They are for Jon as well.  So we go early, often leave early, only go one day of the weekend and be blissfully happy that Revel Grove exists; that friends are around; and most importantly that he can still enjoy the magic.

I live in dread of the day when it's not possible anymore.

Just please, not too soon.

the photo above is of Mimi - one of the mimes.  She sits upon the gate and does bubbles.  A tiny bit of the magic of Revel Grove.